Tinalakwa. Ndiye mutani. Koma tidachita dala. Amatitcha m'badwo wotayika chifukwa sitinkafuna kupambana. Tikuvomera kutaya ngakhale tisanasewere. Tinali olephera, ophedwa; tinagwa mu zosavuta kutsika Mwa zoyipa zonse zomwe timakhala moyo wathu Sitinakalambe kapena kutayika, tinkakhala amoyo nthawi zonse… ndipo tidali akufa.
Tidangolankhula lero chifukwa ndizomwe tidatsala nazo, zazikulu kwambiri masiku ano zaunyamata, mphamvu ndi maloto otayidwa, otopa, okhathamira ndi opaleshoni ya mankhwala. Lero linali tsiku lina lowotcha pakuwotcha kwamoyo. Moyo wanu, moyo wanga, inali nkhani yakanthawi kuti ndiwotche ngati mapepala a kalendala yotopetsa.
Kubwezeretsanso? Unali wamantha. Phunzirani? Ndibwino kuiwala. Kwezani chidziwitso? Tili ndi sukulu yathu yodziwononga, simukadatha kuzindikira.
Mosakayikira, maziko athu anali okhudzana ndi kudziwononga kotchuka komanso kobwerezabwereza; zikuwoneka zopusa, zopanda nzeru, palibe amene amaponya miyala padenga lake, palibe wina koma ife. Tinkakonda kuponya miyala padenga lathu, kuwomba mphepo, ndikupunthwa kangapo pamwala womwewo. Adatiuza "ayi" ndipo tidatsutsa "inde" mokweza; Potsutsana ndi zomwe takhala tikupita nthawi zonse ndipo motsutsana ndi zamakono timamizidwa ndi kunyada kwathu.
Simunatimvetse, musayese kuchita izi tsopano, kuyiwala za ife ndi omwe abwera, za sukulu yathu, kumbuyo kwathu. Ndife ovulala angapo omwe tidayerekezera pasadakhale, ndife osowa kwambiri pazomwe timayambitsa, oipitsitsa kwambiri pamafunde onse, ndi nzeru, nzeru chabe, osatinso zina.
Chiyembekezo cha chiwonongeko chinali malo abwino kwambiri, anali inertia, mphamvu ya centripetal yoyenda mozungulira, chilengedwe cha opanduka omwe alibe moyo, chilichonse chomwe ife, omwe tinadzichititsa khungu, tinkafuna kuwona. Kuwala kuyenera kukhala kwinakwake, koma asalole aliyense kuyatsa! Tidagwirizana bwino ndi mdima womwe udakhala ukulamulira m'miyoyo yathu; nthawizonse, kuyambira nthawi imeneyo, kuyambira tsiku lopatulidwa lomwe pomwe tidasiya kukhulupirira, kukhulupirira chilichonse.
Mwa ichi lero ndaphonya khomo, khomo lomwe ndikadasiya ndilitseguka. Onse omwe anali atachoka kale. Kukhala womaliza sikuwoneka ngati wankhanza kwa ine, komanso sikundipangitsa kuganiza kuti ndimalakwitsa. Inu mukudziwa, kuwongolera kunali kwamantha; koma ndasowa kwambiri ndikusiya khomo lotseguka kwa ine!
Khomo la chiyani? Kuti ndisamangokhalira kulungamitsidwa nthawi zonse kuti sindinali kulakwitsa, kuti ndisatuluke mchikwere ndikuganiza, koma kutsegula ndikufotokozera wina za izi. Ndikufuna chitseko kuti ndisakhale ndi chingwe chomwe ndanyamula m'manja mwanga, khomo ndi njira yopulumukira, moyo watsopano, mwayi, njira ina yomwe m'badwo wotayika sunkafuna kuti tulole tokha.
Kutopa pang'ono ngati ndili ndi nkhawa, sindilinso wachichepere kapena wofunikira kwambiri. Lero (Monga nthawi zonse, ndimaganiziranso za lero), ndili ndi chingwe chakuda pakati pa manja anga, ndimayang'ana pa mtanda, ndikuponyera chingwe pamwamba pake, ndikukwera pampando ndikumangiriza kumapeto kwa chingwe kuti mbali inayo, ndinali nditaiyesa kale, chimodzi mwazinthu zochepa zomwe ndakonzekereratu.
Ndayika khosi langa pakati pa mfundo ndikulisintha kuti lizizizira. Ndikungofunika kukankhira mpando ndipo mimba yanga yakomoka, mawondo anga akunjenjemera ndipo kusungulumwa kwakukulu kumandilasa kuyambira pamwamba mpaka pansi. Apanso ndikulakalaka khomo lotseguka, ndimadziyika ndekha pakhomo pake, ndikupanga ulemu kuti nditsazike, ndikuyang'ana m'mbuyomu kuti ndikadasiya ndikatseka pamenepo. Kenako, powonetsetsa kuti zonse zatha, ndimamenya chitseko mokweza. M'malo mwake, ndimadzimasula pampando, ndichedwa kwambiri kuti ndikonze, monga nthawi zonse m'moyo wanga.